I am a hater.

It’s day 2 of tray 1 and I HATE THIS!!! I know this will sound dumb, but I think I need a vent to those who understand:

I am constantly aware something is in my mouth. Not a moment has passed that I’ve not thought about it. I can’t see how I’ll ever not feel this way.

Individual teeth keep hurting. Yesterday it was one tooth, then this morning I woke up three hours before I normally would to a different tooth hurting, then I put the trays back in after breakfast and now my front top teeth hurt instead. I was fine with the initial pressure, but this has definitely turned into a full on ache now. It’s like every time I put the trays back in, it hurts all over again.

Yesterday I thought my speech was fine, but today I think I’m lisping so badly and talking weird in general. I study linguistics so next week I am going to be around people who I feel like will 100% notice. They’re pretty noticeable visually anyway, but oh man the speech is way worse to deal with. I might go for a long drive alone and speak to myself the entire time in an attempt to get used to it.

I have an open bite so I’m finding the chewies fine for my back teeth, but difficult to use on my front teeth - especially the top.

Taking them out… OW! First of all the amount of saliva is making me wonder how I’ll ever do this in public. It feels fine taking them off my back teeth, but once they’re off them the front ones kill so bad and are much more difficult. I have more attachments there, so I guess that’s why.

Once they’re out I hate it even more, I think. The feeling of the bare attachments against the inside of my mouth is awful. Plus the adhesive they use (I think that’s what it is) makes my teeth feel like they’re covered in plaque. I feel so dirty ahhh.

I hate eating. It’s uncomfortable with the attachments and feels like a chore. Oh it’s lunch time, guess I’ll have to make myself eat when would rather not. I don’t snack much anyway, but that is the most undesirable thing right now. I am at home for most meals, but dreading any times I am not.

My treatment is supposed to be eight months, though I expect I’ll have refinements so let’s say a year. A year is a very short amount of time in the grand scheme of things - especially to change something I’ve been horribly insecure about for ten times that - but at the beginning of it right now I’m like omg I cannot do this for so long. I will because I’ve paid and I want this for me now, past me, and future me, but it feels so so far away.

I’ve seen so many posts saying you get used to it, it all passes etc but I feel like I’ll be the exception and always be totally uncomfortable. Also have a terrible feeling my teeth just won’t cooperate, even if I’m totally compliant.

All I want to do is lie on my bed and read my book but nooo I’m an adult and have to do adult things. Smh for the world not bending to my every whim for a decision I made of sound mind😔

My child sister (don’t want to say her age) thinks it’s all quite cool tho. She was very fascinated by it. At least it’s impressed a child, I guess.

VENT OVER. Thank you for reading this nonsense!

Edit: thank you for the kind words - this is a very pleasant and supportive subreddit. I appreciate everyone who has taken a moment to offer words of encouragement or say they relate(d). Thanks again, all! I do feel a bit better than when I first shared this :)