I can't control my eating habits

In 2019 I did a great diet with CICO and familiarized myself with calorie counting thanks to this subreddit. I'm 168cm (yes, my username is wrong) and before starting said diet I was 95kg. Few months of CICO and I went down to 72kg, probably at an unhealthy rate.

Then I went on a one week vacation and obviously didn't count calories there. On my way back, my phone broke and I lost all my momentum. Pretty much maintained my weight until my mom had to get hospitalized and had complications for months, and it was around the time I started working too. Depression + actually had to money to afford food = just living on fast food. Since then it's been three years and I'm 85kg now.

Two months ago I decided to not order any fast food anymore. I managed to do that and I just eat the calories elsewhere. It was mostly snacks that my family shopped. I learned to resist them and I don't snack anymore nor eat fast food.

The result? Still gaining weight nonstop. I barely have the mental capacity to get out of bed let alone to log calories for everything I eat. I do acknowledge that I eat in way larger quantities than I should and I feel like shit after almost every meal. I work from home so I'm not even active. Even two months ago I tried to count calories again and couldn't manage to stick to 1500 let alone my desired 1200.

Losing my mind. I know it's all in my head and I still can't get myself to eat less. Need advice before I resort to getting help for an ED, thank you.