my boyfriend keeps liking freaky reels but I refuse to do anything sexual with him 😭

I'm 19 and he's 17, there's no way

me and my boyfriend grew up together and have only started have feelings for each other recently. this is still a fairly new relationship and is also his first relationship, hence the reason I don't wanna do anything so quickly or be the first to take his virginity for now (i have a fear of them being disappointed afterwards) . I don't feel like I deserve to be the person that does, considering his best friend is my ex bf and my ex was bragging to him about sleeping with me AFTER he had found out about our relationship. he was obviously upset and I felt bad. he's inexperienced and I'm not

I think maybe in the future it is in the cards for us, but I am not comfortable with this right now

edit since a lot of you are getting the dynamic all wrong. I was single for 4 years and haven't just jumped to his best friend because he was there and i needed someone. I genuinely like him and haven't realized my feelings until this past Sept. I didn't make the first move either. I'm the type of person to like someone in silence. My bf was the first to get ahold of me and that's how we ended up talking. so stop jumping into conclusions lol

as for the age difference, he turns 18 next week and I just turned 19 lol

AGAIN, me and my ex haven't done anything in a long, long time, stop assuming I was seeing them both at the same time.